It is a new month and I am trying to do some changes. But today I got a called from my mom reminding me that on the 16th is when we’re going to temple for my grandpa’s 100 days of death.
Can I tell you how I’m NOT looking forward to go to this. I don’t want to let go. I am not ready to let you go grandpa. It was just 3 months ago that I saw you. That I had a conversation with you. That I sat on your bed and talked about where you were going to sit for my graduation.
I had a hard time at work today. I kept looking up to hold back my tears. It worked. I felt distorted and felt paranoid if other people noticed. But honestly, if they did. I don’t care
You took a piece of me when you left. I can’t find myself when I look in the mirror.
I am a lost soul without you.
How do you say good bye to forever.
How can I accept never seeing you again.
I just can’t.